Possible Motives For Golden Tate's Doughnut Heist

While at Notre Dame, defenses couldn't stop Golden Tate from reaching the end zone. And, apparently, the night bakers at Top Pot Doughnuts can't stop Tate from the doughnuts he craves. Tate has a powerful thirst for competition... and apparently it's countered by a powerful hunger for maple bars.

Some have speculated Tate suffered from a sever case of the munchies, while others, including the Top Pot employee who called police, suspected he was simply "A drunk idiot." --(link to 911 call). Others suspect it's all a publicity stunt by the Official Doughnut & Coffee Provider of your Seattle Seahawks. Perhaps, but what are the other possible reasons Tate was found stealing doughnuts out of the back of Top Pot at 3AM?

1. Golden Tate is a member of the radical Doughnut Liberation Front, whose aim is to free doughnuts from being eaten. Every pastry has a soul. 
2. As part of the Seahawks' community service efforts, Tate was simply trying to feed the homeless.
3. Terrified of being held scoreless, Tate goes on the attack when ever he comes in contact with the number zero, even if it's in the form of a doughnut.
4. Concerned with Leroy Hill's upcoming court hearing, Tate was trying to stockpile doughnuts and coffee in an effort to bribe the police.
5. Even though LenDale White was cut by the Seahawks, Tate still wanted to help his suddenly-slim teammate gain weight. 
6. Since Top Pot Doughnut is the official doughnut and coffee of the Seattle Seahawks, he thought it meant he ate for free there at any time.
7. Any time is a good time to carbo-load.
8. Late at night, the maple bars call to Tate. These temptresses, these pastry sirens, their songs lure in even the most stoic of folk, much like mermaids would call to sailors on long voyages, causing them to dive into the sea.
9. Rookies are responsible for bringing doughnuts to team meetings as part of their hazing. Meetings begin before Top Pot opens. Tate had no other option.
10. Golden Tate is pregnant, and when food cravings strike a pregnant person, everybody better get the F#@% out of the way.

Tate was apologetic after the incident, saying:

"When I got here, that was one of the first things I had," Tate said. "They're irresistible. It was a foolish mistake that won't happen again, but if you ever want some maple bars, that's the place to go. 

"I'm very embarrassed to even have my name a part of this. Before now I never had any type of trouble in school or anything, so I'd rather learn on this than have something a few months or years down the road that's a lot bigger and me being arrested or cited for something. This is definitely a lesson learned for me. Next time I'll just have my buddy go in and buy them."

Golden Tate has been banned from this Top Pot Doughnut location for one year. Give Mighty-O's a chance.

Check out video of Tate's uncomfortable explanation of the heist on Danny O'Neil's blog. You can also purchase an authentic Top Pot Doughnut mug signed by Golden Tate here.

The Newest Seahawks

After the misery of the past two seasons, the Seahawks have dramatically improved their squad through their picks and a few draft day trades. These new arrivals appear like a Navy Seal team rescuing the Seahawk faithful from the prisoner of war camp called losing.

The NFL's new draft format great. It is like waking up to three Christmas mornings... or an abbreviated Hanukkah. By almost all accounts, the Seahawks had one of the best draft days of any team. Through their picks and a couple trades, the Seahawks gave fans some fantastic gifts under the tree.


Let's recap the draft...


1st (6th overall) -- Russell Okung - 6'5" 307lbs - Offensive Tackle - Oklahoma State

Seahawk fans watched the first five picks with baited breath in hopes Okung would fall to them. I'd worked my fingernails down to the nubs by the time Washington drafted Trent Williams, assuring us that Okung would be playing at Qwest Field next year. I bet Matt Hasselbeck's wife broke in tears of joy when the Hawks made the pick. Finally she has someone to protect her husband's blind side.

Seattle's needed a replacement for Walter Jones ever since he went down with a knee injury two years ago. With Big Walt retiring, there are rumors Jones may take a break from sending out motivational tweets to mentor the talented Okung.

Considered one of the top tackles in the draft, Okung will step in and be a starter from day one. Okung is big, strong, and has high character. He may not have as high a ceiling as Trent Williams, the tackle drafted before him, but he's also as sure a thing as there is in the draft. This will go a long way to revamping what was a horrid offensive line last year.

1st (14th overall) -- Earl Thomas - 5'10" 208lbs - Safety - Texas

Taylor Mays may not agree with the pick, but everyone else does. Hawk fans were ecstatic when Thomas fell to them at the 14th pick.

He may not have prototypical size, but at 20-years-old, the talented safety is still growing. His ball hawking skills, speed, and aggressiveness will more then make up for his lack of size. On a Seahawk team severely deficient in play makers, Thomas will give Seattle a player opposing quarterbacks will fear. And in an NFC West featuring Matt Leinert, Alex Smith and a rookie in Sam Bradford, we might just see Thomas take a few interceptions back for touchdowns.


2nd (60th overall) -- Golden Tate - 5'10" 199lbs - Wide Receiver - Notre Dame

It was shocking that Golden Tate fell to the Seahawks 60th pick. Much like the golden arches and Golden Corral, Golden Tate is a great value as a 2nd round pick. I can not believe he was available this late in the draft.

I hate Notre Dame as much as the next guy, but he is such an electric player I am more than willing to forgive him. Seahawk fans are going to love his play making ability. I can just imagine a row of elderly women at Qwest Field next year donning Golden Tate jerseys and calling themselves "The Golden Girls." Talk to your grandmothers about making this happen.

Tate gets knocked for his small size, but he plays bigger, and he always catches the ball at its highest point. He has great hands, makes big catches in big games, and he is dangerous when he has the ball in his hands. He will provide much needed help in the passing and return game.

4th (111th overall) -- Walter Thurmond III- 5'11" 189lbs - CB - Oregon

Should you find yourself stuck in traffic with a sandwich lacking condiments, and a guy with a name like Walter Thurmond III was in the limo beside you. you'd probably ask him if has any Grey Poupon. You'd at least trust him to manage your portfolio. But Thurmond isn't that guy. He's a premier corner back with some serious injury concerns.

On a team that struggled to get interceptions last season, I find it reassuring that most of the pictures of him online feature him with the ball in his hands.

If he can stay healthy, Thurmond could be a solid corner back at the next level. Sure, he's a duck, but Pete Carroll had to game plan for him, so if he's able to draft a Pac-10 rival, then Seahawk fans should be pumped to see him in a Seahawks jersey.

4th (129th overall) -- E.J. Wilson - 6'4" 286lbs - Defensive End - North Carolina

Not to be confused with C.J. Wilson, the defensive end from East Carolina, E.J Wilson is considered a defensive end with a lot of potential. I figured the Hawks would draft Everson Griffen, the highly touted USC defensive end with this pick, but Carroll has a little more insight into Griffen then the rest of us.





 
5th (133rd overall) -- Kam Chancellor - 6'3" 231lbs - Safety - Virginia Tech

Big, strong, fast, athletic... those are all good qualities to have in a safety. The Seahawk roster is thin at defensive back, but Seattle obviously made it the focus of much of their draft.











6th (185th overall) -- Anthony McCoy 6'4" 259lbs - Tight End - Southern Cal

Pete Carroll finally dipped into his old college team with this pick. Anthony McCoy fell down draft boards after he tested positive for marijuana at the NFL Combine. That proved to be an expensive mistake for the skilled tight end because he was expected to be drafted much higher.

McCoy is athletic for a big man and isn't afraid of catching the ball in traffic. He has good hands and runs well with the ball. It will be interesting to see him compete with John Carlson in camp.

7th (236th overall) -- Dexter Davis - 6'1" 244lbs - Defensive Ends - Arizona State

Pete Carroll sure like drafting guys USC played against. Dexter Davis is pretty small and was drafted primarily for his speed and ability to rush the passer. He probably isn't an every down defensive end, but many think he could be an effective third down specialist.






7th (245th overall) -- Jameson Konz - 6'3" 227lbs - Wide Receiver - Kent State

 This is really Jameson Konz's picture. Not exactly what you'd expect from a guy who shocked people with his pro day workout. He is an incredible athlete, with a 46-inch vertical leap and 4.4 40 yard dash. The only downside is nobody knows what position he can play. Some have him listed as a full back or H-back, but the Seahawks plan to try him at wide receiver.

Konz is a wildcard, but he does have rare athletic ability. The Seahawks will need to stock up on shampoo with both Konz and Charlie Whitehurst on the roster.

I can't get over that hair.



DRAFT DAY TRADES
Throughout the beginning of the draft, I kept wondering why the Seahawks weren't drafting a running back. But the new Carroll/Schneider regime pulled off a couple of big trades and landed LenDale White of the Tennessee Titans, and Leon Washington of the New York Jets. That's an upgrade to say the least.

LenDale wasn't seeing much action playing behind Chris Johnson in Tennessee. Now he's reunited with a coach who knew how to make use of his talent. There are always weight concerns when it comes to White, but hopefully the opportunity for playing time will motivate the big fella.

I'm swearing off tequila in solidarity with LenDale doing what it takes to show up fit and ready to run all over the NFC West.

The Seahawks swapped 4th and 6th rounders with the Titans for White. His contract is up at the end of the year.

The Hawks traded a 5th round pick for Leon Washington and a 7th round pick. He is still recovering from a broken leg, but if he can regain his pre-injury form, the Seahawks' running and return game will be much better than last year. This is a huge pick up.

He became expendable when the Jets drafted Joe McKnight out of USC. Washington's contract is up at the end of the year.

The Seahawks also acquired defensive tackle Kevin Vickerson in the LenDale White trade.